No guarantees - muggy weather mumbling

I'm so stupid that I usually wait for Martin to come home, and he finishes at 23:30 every night. After coming home he has some food and we start discussing the daily tasks. Last night I got into bed at 1am. And of course that's terribly late. It was the second day in a row that I woke up at 10am, but we went for a walk right away. Yesterday we took the road to Båleröd, today we walked to Martin's sister.

Martin's sister is not the best company for me though. I can practice my patience. :-) She is very much the opposite of me and we've had quite a lot of problems due to this. So today I practiced patience at her place while Martin fixed her computer. It turned out that she had no clue about how I work, that I'm gonna have an operation and that I got a job in Gothenburg and I'll start there on the 8th Aug. And of course she has no clue about Martin's healthproblem either.


By the way Martin got a letter from Sahlgrenska - basicly a fuck-off-letter - that he needs to go to his local healthcare centre here in Strömstad. That probably means no quick help only neverending waiting lists, idiot local doctors, referals lost, dumb nurses. The situation at Strömstad hospital is pretty much like this. I was mistreated, misunderstood, miswhatever you can imagine several times, and it is not ONLY me, you know, there were many articles in the local newspaper how many people started complaining. One more thing to put an end to this: Sweden has an overall economical crisis, incl. totally fucked up healthcare system, increasing unemployment, less and less communal resources. I'm hoping to see the faces of these fucking naive Swedes when they have to face starving, crime, inflation and things like that. Their mentality doesn't make it easy for them to come down from the pink clouds to the reality! Naive, shy, lazy, spoiled - very many of them!

I gave an ultimate to Martin...but things are not going on for him, he only sent this letter to Sahlgrenska and now he is sent to hell, and he hasn't checked out anything else. It very much reminds me of how it was several times before:"It cannot go on like this! I cannot live with you like this!" - I told him many times. Then he promises something and then he does nothing or little and hopes that I will forget things and as times go on, I might accept the situation. he promised me to look for medical help, to talk to his parents, his sister and my daughter. Ok, my daughter has a friend with her right now, but he hasn't told anything to his sister, and checked out ONE possibility to find any professional help, and only one part of the problem....This makes me sad. And on the other hand he hugs me, tried to have same contact we used to have. it doesn't work for me anymore....